BEING FEARLESS
“It's not about being fearless, it's about acting in spite of fear.” – Veronica Roth
During my at-home wellness retreat, I cut out most forms of media. Everything from music to TV. I still watched motivational YouTube videos, documentaries, and podcasts. Even then, my screen time was limited. I wanted to use the time to think, process, let go, and reframe. Focusing mainly on letting go and reframing.
So, what did I let go? Titles. Labels that I've given myself or picked up along the way that I thought I needed to define me. None of them were too harmful. Most are characteristics that are generally praised. One of those labels is FEARLESS. The Dictionary defines fearless as lacking fear. You might be thinking – but don't you need to be fearless?
WHY I AM NOT FEARLESS
Trust me; I battled with myself about staying fearless or releasing it. As I took a look at the things I wanted to achieve and the woman I was striving to be, I thought, of course, I must be fearless. The last thing I need to focus on was fear when I am trying to achieve goals with, in many cases, nothing but faith. I kept thinking to myself - I can't let fear get in the way of my future.
There it is - my root - failing at the expense of fear. It wasn't that I couldn't move forward without being fearless; it was that I was so scared of letting fear consume me and hinder my path. So, I call myself fearless, don't acknowledge the fear, and everything is ok, right? Wrong. After digging a little deeper, I realized being fearless was consuming me and hindering my path. Instead of acknowledging that it was there, I spent most of my energy trying to pretend the fear wasn't there. Equating my strength to being fearless and then getting upset with myself when the fear didn't go away.
The only way to resolve this ridiculous cycle was to let go of fearlessness and admit that I have fears. I am full of fears, in fact, and that's ok. It's ok to be worried and scared about the unknown. The strength is not in lacking fear but in acknowledging the fear, acting despite it, and having a little faith in yourself and your higher power. So, I am no longer fearless. I am scared as hell! Lol. Even with fear, I believe in myself and am acting despite it.
MOVING DESPITE FEAR
So, you're ready to leap into fear? Here are a few tips to help you let go of being fearless, acknowledge your fears, and take action:
Center Yourself: This step is optional, but I find that doing an activity to center myself before digging into any personal or soul work is always helpful. If you are already in a space that isn't so good, the last thing you want to do is pile on a list of your concerns. Centering activities could be mediation, yoga, running, or even a therapy session. Anything that helps you center yourself and let go of any existing stress.
Acknowledge the Fear: Acknowledgement is key. What are you afraid of? What's the worst that could happen if that fear became true? List them out.
Cut Down to the Root: Now that you know what your fears are, let's get to the root of them. There are various ways to do this. I always do the five whys to drill down to what causes the fear. The more you ask yourself why the closer you get to the root of the fear. It's like walking towards a large shadow in a room. The closer you get, the more you can see that the big shadow was just a small object.
Manage the Root & Act: Once you know the root of the fear, the issue seems much more manageable. Maybe the fear stems from a lack of knowledge or past hurt. Take action to resolve the root issue.
I am not saying that you won't have fear if you follow these steps. On the contrary, you will still have fear, but you can quickly acknowledge it and take action before it consumes you. Fear is a part of the journey. Taking action to resolve the root cause of your fears is part of growth.
CONTINUE THE DiSCUSSION
Want to hear more? Continue the conversation with Mama Paige and me on redefining what being fearless means and how we deal with fear. Listen here!
